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suddenly subsistence is suicide

External Services:
  • dancingdoll2@livejournal.com
23 yrs old. 5'8" 135 lbs.(give or take 5-10 of 'em depending on the day/week/month/time of year)
ex-ballerina. aspiring artist and art psychologist.
i am a vegetarian and am deeply in love with yoga/meditation.
[friends lock because I'm paranoid. add me anyway.]
This LJ was created for my thoughts and obsessive tracking of my ED, but now I post daily at http://dancingdoll86.xanga.com/

LW (at this height): 115lbs
HW (at this height): 146lbs
LTGW:115lbs... maybe 110. haven't decided...
bmi: 20.5
ED: it's a whole jumble of things... but everything began with over exercising as compensation. i've been suffering off and on from eating disodered behavior. the majority of my eating/not eating woes are all tangled up in my drug abuse. it got worse with diet pill and over the counter pain killer abuse.
i've heard it called anorexia athletica, but i guess its a form of bulimia because of the purging quality exercising has.
It's been a vicious circle lasting for the past 7 years... maybe longer now...?

It's all mixed up with my history of drug abuse too...
weed 6 years. coke for 3 (off and on) but i am recovering from this addiction. slowly but surely. [had a mini fuck up recently, but am clean again] had a similar bout w/ black tar heroine. i still drink moderately, if that...
i've experimented with other things as well. X. shrooms. ridalin. adderal. vicodin. percoset. codeine. acid. oxy. etc etc etc. i have a hippie mentality...
trying with all my might to stay sober.

other measurements:
bust- 31in
waist- 26.5in
hips- 36.5in
wrist- 5in
bicep- 10in
upper thigh- 21in
mid thigh- 17.5in
calf- 14.5in (oh ginormous dancer calves!)
rib cage- 30in

want to know more?
ask!!! =)